What was I thinking…I should have come to my senses a mutiple of times. I was 21 years old when I met my boyfriend and proceeded to date him for 2.5 years. After the first year I was working and realized that you could look up information on the county records for land use and information. My boyfriend had been wanting to find some of this information for his work and I happily messaged him the information as I chcked out the site. I wanted to see if there was a charge so I picked up a topic (marriage license) and decided to just enter his name not expecting anything. But there he was, currently married to his ex gf (for apparent ilegal reasons). I agreed to stay with him if he applied for divorce in the next 3 months….what was I thinking. He didn’t so I stayed true to my word. He asked for me back two month later. Again what was i thinking when I said yes. I was out of state with him a couple months later for the Super Bowl party and the second day i had to stay in by myself since I was so sick. He said he would be home early but after him being gone for 12 plus hours I decided to snoop on his cousin’s lap top who we were staying with.
I know this was wrong and I shouldn’t have but I knew i would find something and the calling was just there. I pulled open photo albums because I wanted to see pictures from his recent trip to brazil (he alays claimed he never brought his camera). Going through the album I say pictures of him cuddling with a girl and kissing a girl on the beach and this was on camera, who knows what happened off camera. He promised that’s all that happened and he wouldn’t go on anymore boy’s trips. I stayed with him…what was i thinking!!! A couple months later he goes on another trip to Vegas. I tell him I don’t want him to go but say’s it’s a family trip (him and his cousin, the one who took the pictures) and he was going anyway. He notified me of this 3 days prior. Shortly after I inform him i am going to Los Angelos on a girl’s trip and he breaks up with me. His reason, he thought I would cheat.After I came back he tried to get back together with me but I know what I was thinking this time. No way! I recieve an email from him saying how I am immature and all I can offer a guy is my looks and sex (wish i could post the whole email here) and then attached is a spreadsheet evaluating me on 50 different charaticss that are important to him. I only one I score high on is sex to try to prove his point. I ignore him and several months pass and I recieve text messages saying how he is seeing another girl whose body is so much better than mine and I am an anorexic, fat bitch. I shouldn’t but did text back and said “I don’t believe and I don’t care”. That was a mistake because a month later I recieve another email with just the prhase “I’m so sorry…but I told you I don’t lie” with pictures attached of him being intimate with the new girl. At this point we had been broken up for almost a year so it doesn’t bother me but in the back of my head I always ask myself..”What was i thinking?!”